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This is what one blogger said concerning courtship: “To me, courting became an ideal in the same way that socialism is an ideal — and while I flirted briefly with socialism as a 13 year old (reading some of Marx’s own writings), it didn’t take me long to see that what sounded great in theory and on paper resulted in disaster and catastrophe when implemented in real life.
Through observing the experiences of others, reading exhaustively, and studying Scripture, I have come to the same conclusion about “courting” as a philosophy” — it works much better on paper than it does in practice.” How does it work out in practice?
It is fantastic to make a solid commitment to pursue God’s standards for romance either as an individual or as a family. The answer is they aren’t as different as some might lead you to think.
But just because someone else is doing the same thing but calling it something different doesn’t meant they are any less committed to sticking to God’s plan for romance. The bottom line is that God asks you to wait on His timing for romance, to only date guys who love Him with their whole hearts, and to do whatever it takes to stay away from sexual sin. Note: I will answer one of your love questions each Friday this month.
Last week, I asked you to give me your most burning love questions. More than 100 of you left us a comment with a question about love and romance. Mars asked, “I hear the word ‘courting’ a lot in opposition to ‘dating.’ What are the differences between the two and which relationship is the better of the two? Courtship and dating are words that are thrown around a lot on this blog.
I think Mars is right, that it is important that we know if there’s a difference between the courtship and dating and understand if one is better than the other when placed through the filter of God’s Word. For many, courtship feels like an old-fashioned word that conjures up images of a couple sitting in a living room under the watchful eye of parents until the fella gets down on one knee and proposes. Song of Solomon 8:4 says, “Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” In fact, this statement is repeated three times throughout the book Song of Solomon. Pursuing romantic intimacy before marriage is a real possibility opens you up to all kind of struggles. Involving your parents in your romantic relationships is a great way to honor them and to make sure that your plans for your love life line up with theirs.
It’s a mentality that causes us to live in the moment, rather than building a future at the same time.
It’s no wonder Christians tend to freak out about dating.
I’ve been around a lot of girls who court and a lot of families who want their children to court. Clearly, the basic principles of courtship are so important to living a lifestyle of purity.
(Read that post here) Debra Fileta, author of True Love Dates, comments about the courtship vs dating debate in an article posted in Relevant Magazine, “The world of dating can be hard to navigate for a young Christian.
Dating in wider society is often portrayed as a feel-good experience.
I have known lots of girls who haven’t committed themselves to courtship and yet, they don’t date just for fun; they only date guys who seem like good husband material, they involve their parents in their decision making and they do everything possible to keep their relationships pure.
I have found this to be an area where some people fall into pride. I grew up as a member of the homeschool community back when we were hiding from the cops and getting our textbooks from public school dumpsters.